……..and your still reading
Yes it’s been awhile since I have placed words & thoughts on paper. Writing is a great escape for me, it helps me relax my mind and provides a great vehicle to express my thoughts, dreams, hopes, goals, fears and emotions. Each of us experience all these feelings and more and often hold them inside ourselves. So for me I have chosen this vehicle of escape and expression to be most rewarding and freeing.
Just to bring you up to speed since my last posting, I’ve had another birthday as well as another grandchild. My personal business career is still stable and yet always changing, now shifting from selling to sharing. At home my life is growing in joy more each day while some in my own family are not so blessed. I worry more about family and others in my life today more than worry for myself. Each day, week, month and year it seems I am becoming more and more comfortable in my own skin. My spiritual alignment and belief in a power greater than myself and others has only strengthened over this last year. It’s true I have made many new friends since we last spoke as well have lost some.
So you may be wondering why I’m sharing all this? How is this helping you may be asking?
Perhaps I am establishing a new baseline for the life journey I am still on. As I have grown older I am finding my life standards and priorities have shifted. Most of my life it seems I have lived in survival mode. Always worried about work, money, rent, fear of loss and so much more. Now more and more these worries have disappeared and often are replaced by my concern for others dear to me and even those in this world I do not know at all. Writing helps me sort out what’s important, writing makes it possible to be open about my feelings and even opinions. Writing helps me establish goals and set plans to reach them.
I am hopeful that writing about my struggles with integrity to weight loss, from alcoholism to sobriety may help someone else know they are not alone. I am hopeful that the plans and goals I set in my life will inspire some to keep trying, to never give up in fact always keep getting up. Being knocked down, hurt, insulted, humiliated, sometimes just embarrassed or ashamed is not the end of our journey. Our failures or faults are not who we are but rather what builds us. Life experiences, trials and jubilations are character marks of our soul.
Today I am not writing to share my goals and dreams for the coming months and years but rather ask that you think of yours? What character marks of your soul drive you? Perhaps some of what I share in the months to come will cause you to wonder about your own life journey?
I ask myself everyday how I can improve, just a little. Everyday I try to find a way to help someone just a little. Everyday I fail at something just a little. Everyday I even look back and smile about something. Sometimes I even cry a little. Little steps, little things change you just like they have been changing me.
I will share this about personal change. It’s slow! All these little things, these little habits, those small victories and failures. The reading, watching and listening to positive people and experiences are ever life changing. All of a sudden these little things we do begin to become you. One day you just stop and realize you are becoming who you’re supposed to be.
It’s funny or actually not so funny? Every so often I am reminded of my old life, the person I once was. The person who held so much in, who was never real. The guy that never paid a bill on time and had to act like a big shot all the time. That man who cared more about himself and how he wouldi be perceived by others rather than care about others. Once in a while these reality checks happen and when they do my inside character fights back. I am not that person today and I know it! Yet I have learned these character flaws are still in me and once in while my actions or decisions at that moment have let them guide me. I can tell you that these struggles are still within me but today it’s easier to put them away. Yes, we get better and our lives change a little at a time.
So here we are together this middle of February 2015. Are we just playing out another ordinary year? Or has change within you changed you enough to be composing a new year? Perhaps it’s difficult to answer that question.
I know my answer,
I’m still writing, you’re still reading so please keep following…….